“He will ask if you are comfortable. You say yes.”

She pauses to take a long drag from her cigarette.

“He will ask if it feels natural. You say yes.”

A long exhale, sinuous smoke.

“He will ask if it hurts. You say no.”

The cigarette drops to the ground.

“You do whatever he asks of you.”

She grinds the toe of her left pump.

“You will probably get angry at him. Throw things.”

She lifts her her chin slightly. A faint scar appears.

“Later you see the picture.”

She changes position, adjusts a strap, readies herself.

“You will be gorgeous.”

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Back in 1999, I started a website that became an all-consuming project, IS300.NET (changed to my.IS in 2005).  It became the largest online community for the Lexus IS sport sedan. Sure, it’s just one car from one brand, but 70,000 members and over 4 million forum posts tells you that the Lexus IS isn’t just any car. In 2007, I sold the site and turned to photography fulltime, but I’m still very proud of what was created out of nothing. My friend Joaquin (the only writer I know that uses more parenthesis than myself) has posted a nice retrospective on the site for this ten year anniversary, please check it out here.

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Of my arsenal of unique skills, I covet my ability to name things. To be more specific, I like naming systems, or at least groups of things. I take great pain in some of the more unfortunately named things in my consumer history.

I owned and operated a website for the Mitsubishi Montero Sport while owning one. It was difficult to get the message across that the Montero Sport was not a Montero, nor a smaller or related version. A few years later, when I was actively looking for a Montero, a prospective seller drove his truck 60 miles for me to see it, only for me to then discover what was advertised and discussed as being a Montero, was actually a Montero Sport. Frustrating.

Among my favorite bands is another example of bad naming strategy: The The. What was previously ironic and rebellious (The Smiths?), is now virtually impossible to google (is this a real verb yet?).

I found this article today with maps that have had their place names researched and translated to English. The staggering blandness and often erroneous naming is a delight my sarcastic sensibilities. Granted, many places have been named after their unique geographical attributes (Western Steps, Land to the Right), but others…
The Thousand Islands, and the next group over, The Hundred Thousand Islands. Town of Happiness, next to Town of Submission. Palace on the coast, and Here is the Palace located a little further inland.

http://www.spiegel.de/fotostrecke/fotostrecke-37310.html

Enjoy.

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I’ve been lazier than usual around here, so it’s time to clean up and catch up. I have plenty of images to post from recent shoots, including my first maternity session. So turn around, stick it out, even white boys have to shout: I’ll be back.

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